Thanksgiving 2010

I have learned so much from so many people. When I was growing up, women were 'housewives' or 'homemakers'. This was their job, their career, their profession, and I had aunts who did a bang up job at it.  My mom was good at it, too, but in a different way.  She was tops at the 'looking after' part, the keeping the community, the church and us  in line part, a little less enamored with the housework part. To open up the hallway cupboard in our house  was to risk death.  HEY!  I am NOT committing blasphemy here.  My mom was a gifted woman, but she would be the first to agree with what I just said.  Ask her when you see her.

 Quite frankly, while I would not go back to the days of less pay for the same, or better, work, I do feel that as we have progressed, at times, we have lost something....that time that was spent looking after those people in our families.   Of course, there were those lunatics who took it to an entire different level;  we call them 'helicopter moms' today.  For  the most part, though, the women who influenced me had their own interests which they pursued while , at the same time, providing  invaluable services to their families  There was something to be said for having them there.  Because they were home to prepare dinner, help us with our homework, make sure we weren't 'making whoopie' with the boy o' day while they were at work, we were, to some extent, a lot safer than kids are today.  I guarantee you that we were better nourished. They cooked real food for dinner, and there was no such thing as fast food.

 I think that, as a society, when we decided that women had to work outside the home in order to be validated, we made a huge misjudgment.  While a lot of women feel strong enough to define their own roles within their family, I guess I wish that all people, both men and women, felt able to make their own paths, be who they really want to be and let the rest of the  world just deal with it.    Myself, I had , for a while, the best of both worlds.  I was able to spend ten years at home with my kids before I went back to work, and I am thankful for that time.  Moving on.

Another thing so many of my aunts taught me was that a person should make the best of whatever situation in which she found herself.  That may have been a mantra that members of my entire family espoused, both men and women. One of my brothers says that the family motto should be 'Suck it Up, Stop Whining  and Get it Done'  I don't disagree with that.

At any rate, one of my Aunts, my Aunt Leona , elevated 'homemaking' into a high art form. That women could have  sent Martha Stewart home to contemplate her own inferiority.  When Onie did laundry, she would go to the basement and remain all day until it was done.  Oh my gosh!  She ironed her sheets!   Of course, as my Mother pointed out, she had no kids.  So,  she had time for that sort of thing. And, she could  have cooked rings around Paula Deen. Onie's bourbon balls were, quite simply, not to be believed.  I, at times, have wondered what ever happened to her cookbook.

All of that having been said, since I have been out here, I have found myself spending Thanksgiving all on my own. My friends who live at the school all go to their families, and  it's too short a holiday for me to drive to Oklahoma.  And, although I have been invited, a time or two, to accompany one of my friends to  family celebrations, I have chosen to remain at home.  Not that I would not prefer to be with family members, but I have come to treasure my peaceful and solitary holiday.  I fix only the foods I enjoy (the green bean casserole) and don't bother with the ones that others like, but I don't (sweet potatoes).  I watch a lot of television that I have DVR'd and not had time to watch, and if it's a nice day, I'll go out and take pictures. I give thanks for my loved ones and my life.    This year, I'll get caught up on the work I have due for my grad school class (the one my cousin, Jana, told me not to take).

Since being out here, one of the dishes that I have always prepared,  and this is why my Aunt Leona is on my mind today, is a turkey breast which I coat with peach preserves.  I can still hear  her, 'This is just the ticket ( to her, everything was just the ticket) for small families.  It's just enough for two or three people without all the mess of an entire turkey'  This year, as usual,  I set off to the grocery store to purchase a turkey breast. What I found was that the turkey breast was twenty dollars, but the entire turkey was less than sixteen dollars.  So, I bought the entire turkey, and I have to admit, I have enjoyed the dark meat and the home made giblet gravy.

 The question becomes what to do with the left over turkey once I get sick of it.  And this is where I realize that I am NOT that much like my aunt.  If I were Onie, I would cut that sucker up into little meal sized portions, break out the Seal a Meal and freeze them. Since I am Sally, I'll, probably, just feed the leftovers to the coyotes.

Happy  Thanksgiving, I love you all and hope that the upcoming year brings you all the best.

November 11, 2010

My mother passed away on November 11, 1996.  The fact that she died on Veterans' Day always seemed , to me, somewhat fitting.  My mother loved this country with every bone in her body.   During VietNam, when I would rant, she would listen, but say very little.  Years later, when she would concede that I may have had points to make during that conflict, she would always end the conversation with,'Yes, this country has problems, but there is no better country on the face of this planet, and you need to always remember that.'  The anniversary of a person's death is, in the Jewish tradition, a time for remembering them with a Yahrtzeit .  As I am not near a synagogue (if that's not the understatement of the year), I content myself with lighting a candle and remembering her.

Then, this afternoon I drove into Kayenta with the intention of picking up the supplies required to winterize my truck--antifreeze, oil, filters, etc.  I found the automobile parts store  to be closed for the Veterans' Day holiday. Now, Veterans' Day is observed back east with parades and color ceremonies, but  I would be hard put to think of a privately owned business that closes down on November 11.   I realized, and not for the first time since coming out here, how deeply patriotic the Navajo people are.  These  people, have stepped forward to defend this country in every armed insurrection since World War II. It's not that they don't recognize the faults that are present in our society.  They  will tell me to remove the feather decoration from my rear view mirror before I leave the Nation, because I may get harrassed by ignorant people who pass me and assume, from the decoration, that I am Navajo.  And yet, even given those sorts of issues,  these people, overwhelmingly,   love this country and honor it every chance they get.

It has brought to mind the current tendency of some people to determine who is and who is not a loyal American. There has been a lot of talk about  which political party, which religion, which race a person must be in order to be considered to be  a 'true' American. And, the point I want to make is that sort of thinking is just 'messed up' as my students say.    The Japanese Americans fought with honor during World War II.  The Navajo , as well as other Native Americans, have given their lives so that the rest of us can continue to live free. My family is chock full of men and women who have served this country, in the military and through their non-military service, and believe me, no one in my family--NO ONE-- fits any pre-determined mold anyone ever conceived.  Each and every one of us is a one and only.  But, each one is and was a patriotic and loyal American.  Americans come from all religions, all races, and we all have differing world views.  That's what makes this , as my Mom pointed out, the greatest country on the face of this planet.

In closing, Thank you to all people who have served this country, and Mother, I miss you.  

Today

In the course of this day, I fished two young men out of the boys' bathroom and  hauled them back to English Comp.  I walked into one class, caught one of my 'ducklings' napping , tapped him on his head, sent him to wash his face and threatened to kill him if he fell asleep again.  I tutored two young ladies in geometry, worked on an IEP and returned a basketball.  Throughout this entire day, I, also, kept my country offered up in prayer.   I prayed that my fellow citizens would vote from love  and not from fear and hate.  This country was founded on the principle of 'freedom and justice for all'  Please let it be so.